I have this amazing coworker who might low-key be a sex therapist, or at least I think she should become one. She's very experienced and knowledgeable when it comes to sex and relationships. We ended up talking about kinks and fetishes (which is not uncommon here... we've talked about worse in the ICU) and honestly, I didn't think I had a kink or fetish... Hell, I didn't even know there was a difference between kink and fetish.
So very quickly, a kink is something sexual a person LIKES to do with themselves or with their partner while a fetish, the person NEEDS that sexual something to achieve arousal or orgasm. Kinda confusing, yes, but here's a perfect example from PureWow, "If one night in bed, you accidentally hear your neighbors going at it and it turns you on, that’s kinky. But, if you need to listen to or watch others having sex in order to feel aroused then that’s a fetish."
Anyways, back to me, my feminist friends are gonna side eye me for this one but apparently I have a praise kink. A praise kink is when a dominant person or top showers their submissive or bottom partner with compliments, kind words, and other sorts of praises. It's also called affirmation play, which I kinda like better cause it sounds less like, she has daddy issues. I tell my coworker, "so what I like being praised, that may just be a Leo thing???" Like any woman, I like compliments and praises especially from the person I'm intimate with but ya'll there's a difference. For example, when I'm sucking my man's dick, I want him to grab my hair look me in the eyes and tell me, "that's my good girl, I wish you could see how you look right now". Chileeeee, my heart skipped a beat as I typed that. Again, completely different from "hey, you look nice today".
At first, I was a little embarrassed, cause like WTF. It's not like I heard harsh words growing up, I have a great relationship with my parents, and overall, a trauma-free childhood. My coworker told me having a kink doesn't mean I'm broken... Which made me feel a lot better about having this kink! Naturally, I like to feel appreciated. I don't like to wonder how someone really feels about me and praise kinks gets right to the point. I also love being called princess and baby girl because I'm spoiled : )
Here's a few I found online that I think my fellow praise kink ladies might like:
Good girl (it's a classic and can be added on to any of the following)
You deserve this
Your'e so beautiful.. Tell me your'e beautiful
I wish you could see how you look right now
Look at you
You can do better than that, come on.. that's right, good girl
Who's daddy's good girl
That's my pretty girl
I'm not asking you, I'm telling you baby girl
You always know just what I need
You listen so well
Good, now faster
Who's my pretty little slut/whore? (if you also like a little degradation)
Your [hands/mouth/pussy etc] feels so good
You have no idea what you're doing to me
Take it for me, I know you can
There's a bunch more! Just gotta google it. Hell, even TikTok has tons of videos on what to say for a boy, girl, nonbinary, etc.